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Free came to live with us when she was barely a week old. It was love at first sight for me and Princess. I lived in the country at the time and worked as a Respiratory Therapist at the local county hospital. I heard one of the nurses talking one day that they had found a newborn deer in their grapevine orchards and would be unable to raise this one. They had raised many over the years and just couldn't take on the responsibility of another one. As well this one had been injured by their dogs when they had found her. Not badly injured but some scrapes and cuts were on her. I didn't care, I wanted the opportunity to take her, nuture her and love her and someday return her to the forest.
I already had several animals at home and what was one more? We had my horse in the pasture across the road, two Pomeranian's and their 4 puppies (in the house), two cats, and a flop eared bunny rabbit in there as well. We also had a baby flying squirrel that had taken up residence in our fireplace flue, which would come out and into the house at night. We had a regular menagerie of animals. Just in case you haven't figured it out thus far I love animals.
I made arrangements with my friend to take her home with me the day my husband was able to come home from his surgery. I had already planned on taking a week off from work to help him recuperate. The day he was discharged she brought the little fawn to me at the hospital. Now mind you here is my husband Asshole 1, sitting in the passenger seat of the car from just having had hernia surgery and I plop a fawn into his lap and drive home. I had no idea how to raise a deer, what they ate or where I would even put her once home. I just knew I wanted her!
My friend had told me she would drink milk from a bottle and eventually to place her on grains and fruits so she would have an easier time adapting to the wilds.
She was beautiful and sat fairly politely in Asshole's lap on the ride home. When Princess came in from school she is the one who named her. I tried feeding her powdered milk since it was cheaper but she wouldn't take to it. The vet suggested I try goats milk. At the time goat's milk was rather expensive as well and I ended up giving her whole milk. She loved it and greedily drank about a gallon of milk a day.
I know it was bizarre to raise her in the house with us but it worked. That first day at home she and the dogs and cats became acquainted to one another. We all held her, fed her and just loved on her. The dogs and cats were inquisitive for another animal to be in their home but they got along with her. I remember that night when we went to bed we left her on a pallet we made in the corner of our living room. Not long after getting into bed I looked up and she had came into our room. Moments later she jumped up and onto our water bed as if she were one of the dogs. She snuggled up between my husband and myself and went to sleep. She was adapting really well. It was really strange to have a newborn fawn sleep with you during the night but so sweet at the same time. When she became hungry during the night and any time she got hungry she made bleating noises just like a goat. At least that is what it sounded like to us.
After a few days of living there she romped and played with throughout the house. Our house had wood floors which made it hard for her to run and romp like deer do because then she would get all spindly legged and would be slipping and sliding across the floors. It was like watching her on a ice covered pond. I placed several sheets around on the floor so as to make it easier for her to play and run. This trick worked.
After about a week of nothing but milk I decided to try her on fruit. She loves Peaches, grapes, apples and most anything I brought her home. One of her favorite fruits was muscadines which thankfully we had growing in our yard. Another of her favorites was cinnamon toast. I had made it one morning for Princess before school and gave Free a small piece. I wasn't sure if she would eat it or not but she gobbled it up and bleated for more. She could and would have ate an entire loaf had I fed it to her. This became her morning treat. Each day I would make this and she would stand patiently staring at the oven until it came out.
At about the second day it dawned on me she had not pooped at all. This concerned me and I called the vet. He told me what to do to help the situation and to imitate her mother. I had to take a warm wet washcloth and gently rub her behind with it to stimulate her. It was not something I found to be pleasant at all but I only had to do it once for her and then she knew what to do for the remainder of her time with us. She was actually very easy to house train. I put puppy pads down at first and then we started using a leash to take her outside to do her business. After maybe one or two weeks of using the leash we were able to take her outside without it. She caught on really quick and would then go to the front door of the house and take her front hooves and tap the door and bleat to be let out after that. We then could let her go out by herself and when she was ready to come back inside she done the same thing. She became one of our house dogs. It completely astounded our friends and the vet that she would actually do this. In all honesty she got to the point that if someone knocked on our door she would run to it like our dogs and bleat to let you know someone was there. I laughed and joked that someday she might actually start barking because she didn't realize she was a deer. I think she thought she was one of the dogs.
Free lived with us till she was about three months of age. Her spots had disappeared and she would stay longer and longer outside each time she went. I knew it wouldn't be long before it was time to let her be free. By this time we had decided we would give her to a local animal shelter which was like a zoo for wild animals. Here she would be safe, well fed and we would never have to worry about hunters. She had became so tame she would go up to anyone that came around and I worried a lot about hunters. We had put on a bright pink collar on her from day one and as she got older and grew we would loosen it up around her neck.
The day Free left is one I will never forget. We had company over and Princess had let her out to play. We were all BBQ'ing outside and having a good time. The kids were playing and watching her play as well. When it came time to go in that night Free was no where to be found. She didn't come when called as she had always done. We searched around the pasture for her but could not find her. Needless to say we all cried and did not sleep well that night. I told myself and Princess that she knew it was time to go and that if she wanted to come back she would be able to find her way. It was hard those first few days on all of us. She had brought so much love into our home and so much joy. I cry now as I think of all the things she had done while a large part of our lives.
A couple of days after she had been gone one of the neighbors called to tell me he had seen her in the woods next to our house. She still had her collar on and when he called her name she looked up and over at home but remained where she was. This made us all feel so much better to know she was where she needed to be.
After about one week I was driving home from work and about one mile from the house at the edge of the woods I seen a herd of deer next to the pond. I decided to stop and see if one of them might be her. I called her name and one of them came trotting over towards me. It was Free and I could see her bright pink collar shining in the sun. I called her name again and she trotted a few more steps towards me and then stopped and looked back at the rest of the herd. You could tell she was torn as to what to do. I stood there watching her from the distance and never called her name again. I knew in my heart she was where she belonged. She was Free and happy and I had been given the opportunity to be a mother deer to her for three months. I like to think I had done my job well.
Free had became an important part of our lives and one pet and love we will never forget.
I have found myself lately following a lot of blogs from people who live in the country and have small farms. Farms with chickens, cows, goats, pigs, horses and critters of all kinds and I must confess it has made me long for the days I used to live in the country. The sights, sounds and smells I am finding myself missing dearly. The freedom of the country will always call me home. The long drives through the forest on returning from a stressful day of work was always one of my favorite things to do. I could drive for hours and never hit a paved road and never see another living soul during these drives. I would often find myself stopping by the creeks and skipping rocks, listening to the water gently falling down the waterfalls, hear the birds calling up above and just lay back on the creek bed and watch the sky and de-stress the day away. More often than not I would see deer in the edges of the forest, gingerly walking along and eating their afternoon meal. Standing by the edge of a pond their ears perked for passing cars and sounds of another world. Deers are one of the sights I miss the most of country living. My family once raised a deer from a newborn to about three months of age. From the time of her spots till the time they disappeared, she was our baby and we raised her in our house just like the puppies. We named her "Free" because we knew someday when she was ready we would turn her loose and let her be free again. Not now but another time, maybe tomorrow, I will tell you all about Free.
I lived for many years in the country in a town called Mountain View in the Ozark mountains of Arkansas. 
The town is called "the folk music capital" of the world or so I was always told. You could always find musicians sitting around the court square playing fiddles, guitars and banjos from daylight till dusk. I remember quite vividly when I first moved there making fun of this type of music and saying more than once "how could anybody enjoy listening to that crap", but over time it grew on me. To the point that I found myself being one of the ones who would take my lawn chair and sit around the fires in the evenings listening and tapping my foot to the music they played.
Mountain View is also famous for it's Beanfest and Great Champion Outhouse Races. This is held in October of each year and most of the business's on the court square gather together and cook huge iron kettles of beans around the square. Along with pans and pans of cornbread to accompany the beans. When they have cooked and prepared this feast for several hours then it's all passed out to the visitors for free. Games are played all day long, music is also played and crafters from all over the state have booths set up around the square. After the beans are ate it's time for the annual outhouse races. Anyone can participate and everyone has fun. You should see some of the outhouses they have built over the years. All naturally have a toilet seat where the driver sits and many have toilet paper streaming out the backs of the outhouses on wheels. It is a sight to see. They have certain specifications they have to adhere to. One person sits on the "throne" and they can have as many "pushers" as necessary to win the race.
There were so many things to do while living in the country. 
We camped quite often by Sylamore Creek which joins and runs into White River. Regardless of what time of year you went for a dip in the creek it was cold. Almost a blue cold as you could see when leaving the water. Your lips were blue but regardless our kids couldn't get enough. We also took many tours in Blanchard Springs Caverns.
I lived in this town for about 12 years and do still go back to visit my son and grandchildren as often as I can. I don't know if I will ever call it home again but in my heart it will always be home to me.
Today dawned bright, clear and a little chilly. I should know since I've been up since 4 am. It's not that I am not sleepy, cause God knows I am, but my joints ache so bad I cannot sleep. Is this another part of mid life torture for me? Is this arthritis? Has all the rubber that holds my joints together evaporated and worn out? Because that's exactly what it feels like. Like my hip joints are rubbing completely up against one another and grinding. Whatever it is I wish like hell it would go away. Over the counter pain meds is just not working anymore. Hell they didn't work to well to begin with.
I told Trucker yesterday afternoon it was going to rain in the next couple of days. God I have become my grandmother and simply bypassed my mother altogether.
On a bright note I was awake to see the beautiful sunrise filtering through the trees in our backyard. To watch the squirrels scampering about and the pair of turtle doves that frequent my feeder eating and enjoying their breakfast. I was also awake to wish Trucker well on his way to work and fix him some morning coffee he thought he died and went to heaven. And I'll still be awake to wish Princess a good day at school when she wakes.
On a sad note however I made the mistake of taking my high blood pressure meds which contain a fluid pill, and drinking two cups of coffee. So this means even if the pain eases up I still will get no sleep for a few more hours. Damn waking up early makes me a complete dumb ass.
Edited: What did I tell you? That it would rain? Huh, what's that you say? You doubted me! I now hear God bowling up high.
It's funny how things change over the course of time in a husband/wife relationship. Trucker and I will be celebrating our 2nd wedding anniversary tomorrow and we to have changed. Or at least our relationship has.
After Saturday's Prom festivities and all subsided we spent a relaxing Sunday together with the Rug Rats while Princess slept in. Trucker finally was able to mow the yard since the rain let up, cut some tree branches, and do general outdoor work, then we decided to cook burgers on the grill. 
The Rug Rats cousins were next door at their grandmother and all were playing outside and having a grand time. Blowing bubbles,
playing in the water hose and sprinklers, and chasing each other around the yard. Trucker and I had front row seats to the excitement. We talked about your normal stuff, watched the kids, birds and squirrels play.
We talked about how much more yard work we wanted to do by planting flowers in the empty beds, what to do about the eyesore of a club house that sits in our backyard, one trucker built for his kids many years ago that now is falling down,
and just sitting in companionable silence together. It's nice to know that we as a couple can just completely relax with one another and not spend the time constantly talking, flirting, and trying to figure out what the other is thinking. Just sit and enjoy the sights and silence together.
We have both grown in the last couple of years into what some might consider a boring couple. We don't feel the need to party, to always have something on the agenda to do, and fill our time together being on the go. We are content to just be together.
Later that night after tucking the Rug Rats into bed and the house was silent again, trucker and I crawled into bed. We both flipped on our bedside lights and picked up our books and started reading. After about 30 minutes of this I noticed trucker watching me out the corner of my eye. He continued this for a bit of time and I just kept right on reading and ignoring him. Finally wondering what the heck he was doing I asked him. His response "How much longer till your done with that book? I've been waiting all day long for nighttime".
I guess in some ways we haven't changed one bit. Which is also nice to know as well.
As everyone here who reads my blog knows tonight is Junior/Senior Prom night. I know you're probably really sick of hearing about it, but this topic of it is sorta different.
Yesterday after Princess and all the other juniors who helped got finished with the decorating, she had her pedicure and manicure scheduled. No, I am not going to whine about the fact that I am 46 and never had one myself and here she is all of 17 and having her first. OK, I lied, I am going to whine about it. I want one, I want one. It looked delicious to have someone rub lotion and massage your feet and actually have an excuse to sit for a long time with said feet in a bucket of sudsy water, just relaxing. Oh well I can dream and whine here. Now whining done and over with and back to original topic.
Anytime I go somewhere and know I am going to be sitting for any length of time I take along whatever book I am reading for just this purpose. It's also an excellent way to listen in on the local town gossip as you appear to be reading but are actually eavesdropping you must remember to turn the pages when doing this, to hear all the news in a small town. And all southern ladies know this is THE place to hear all the gossip in the south. You know, like who has slept with who, who is behind on house payments, whose child got kicked out of school for something bad, and this sort of thing. Naw really it's not that exciting but damn close. Yesterday I learned a lot of new and interesting gossip news.
The shop was full of teenagers tanning, getting manicures/pedicures, hair cuts and colors and all sorts of teenager goings on. I am steadily reading listening, to my book. Only looking up occasionally too see the progress on Princess and oohing and awwing over it. Several teenagers come in that I know personally from and through the times they have been to our house and spent the night, rode around town with Princess and attend the same youth group at church.
One particular conversation did capture my attention. It also shocked me to hear and learn what this child is wearing tonight. Or should I say not wearing! Princess has told me how most of the girls are dressing and whether they are long formals or short. This shocking teenager is wearing a short formal to the prom. It's not shocking that she is wearing a short dress but shocking to hear her say to everyone of her teenage friends that she is not wearing any underwear, no panties, Nada, just air. In a short prom formal. What is she thinking? Well maybe I don't really wanna know what she's thinking or doing for that matter.
Princess had already told me how this girl and her date have been practicing for one particular dance and how it is sorta slutty, not my word, but Princess's. Apparently this dance has a lot of moves to where the girl backs up against the boy and bounces her behind up and down against his front side. Now with no underwear!
I must make another appointment for myself at the beauty shop on Monday so I can sit and read, eavesdrop again to hear how this girl has been the next child kicked out of school.
Things are starting to get a little hectic around here the last few days. Princess is gearing up for her Junior Prom night of fantastic dresses, fabulous hair, gorgeous nails and lots of fun. Of course we can't leave out the limo they have rented as well. I am still reeling over the cost of this limo as is trucker. We have been saying it may have been cheaper just to go ahead and buy Princess a car instead of having paid her portion of this limo.Princess has been out of school since noon today and all the girls, and I guess some guys, are at the Elementary School Cafeteria decorating now. Let me tell you they have their work cut out for them in this department. I seen the lunchroom the other night for the first time and I have to say I am having a very hard time visualizing it being turned into "Deep Blue Destiny". The theme which was chosen this year. Under sea deep blue oceans. Twinkling lights, starfish and no telling what else they are doing. I asked why didn't they just rent a nice banquet room somewhere or hold it in the local country club which has a dance floor already. I was then told that if they chose this option they would all have to ride in the big yellow school bus to their prom. Ewwww, not that way.....
So if you don't see me around for the next few days, then know I am off taking Princess to her manicure/pedicure appointments, hair and makeup appointments, and shoving and zipping her into her dress. Of course I will return with many, many pictures of this night.
For now I will leave you with a few pictures taken the other night after the Honor Society Banquet.
Hormones seem to come into play around middle age and I often wonder if that's good or bad. Mother's Day was no exception to the rule. I hate when my hormones are this way. One minute laughing hysterically at any and everything and the next a sobbing red nosed mess with tissues all around. No matter how many times I try explaining how I feel to trucker he quite honestly never seemed to understand. He always ended up blaming himself for my crying and thinking he has done something wrong in one way or another. I think he finally understood yesterday that it is not something I can help and most assuredly would like to not happen.
My Mother's Day started out in a grand way with trucker bringing me breakfast in bed along with my coffee. This started an avalanche of hormones flowing and I laughed and cried all at the same time. He at first thought he hadn't cooked something right or made a mistake of some sort. After explaining once again "it's just hormones" we both laughed again.
The day progressed like any day on the weekend here. Housework to be done, meals to be cooked and other chores done by all. All the kids wished me well and went about their usual activities. I never heard from my own son however and this did make those damn hormones that much worse. I tried for the most part of ignore it, to let the feelings go and just bury them deep inside and suffocate them out. For the most part this worked if I stayed busy and didn't think about it.
I cooked a large family meal (yeah, something most other mothers get done for them on this day) and we went to sit down to eat together in our dining room. Rug Rat 2 asked if he could wait a minute before sitting down. No problem we told him "what's up." He went out of the room and came back with a single pink rose in a vase and handed it to me, all the while grinning from ear to ear in his sweet way. My eyes welled up with tears as I reached out to hug him close and thanked him for what he had taken the time to do for me. That single simple pink rose meant more to me than anything anyone had done or could have done. In that moment I forgot about how my own birth son had forgotten the day and cried for the joy that this, my second son had given me. His simple act of a single rose being given to me reminded me that even though he may not be my birth child he is my child in heart.
Free Glitter GraphicsLike a Rose
What a lovely and enchanted rose
you are my mother
Genuine, sincere, and your beauty
unlike any other
Like a rose, a purpose there is
for mother's thorns
Your wisdom, love, and sometimes
even your scorns
you live your life to direct
and guide us with your bless
never complaining about the pain
we cause or the stress
Mother you are an angel
spreading sweetness around
Sacrificing, given, and your kindness
is so profound
In my heart forever you'll be a rose
in full bloom
Pure love, great compassion,
and a scent of luxurious perfume
A heart my mother you have,
surely made of the finest gold
Wisdom greatly shines every day
as the years unfold
Your soft heart is like a sweet garden
of rare beauty
Being compassionate to others
it seems to you as duty
Thoughtfulness and gentleness
I feel as your words flow
When ever I see you smile deep
in my heart love glows
Yes mother, no one could ever in my heart
take your place
I always turned to you when obstacles
I had to face
For that mother and for giving me
the pleasure of many things
I thank you for the happiness in my life
you constantly bring
It's so easy to say here sweet words,
indeed so true
Right now and forever mother,
I will always love you
You have been a great human
giving us a magical pleasure
Mother You are the gift from God
I will always treasure - Bilal Anaim
I was reading a blog the other day and the blogger was discussing what her most embarrassing moment in time had ever been. I do not remember though where I read this or I would link back to it. Her most embarrassing moment was not one I would have considered for one minute. As were most of the responses she had received to it. Upon my comment back for my moment in time I think I won had it been a contest hands down with my answer.
So fellow bloggers I am asking you to share yours with me. That is after you regain control of yourselves after reading mine.
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When trucker and I first discussed his idea of going into trucking as a career we also gave serious talk to the fact that our sex life would be different think null and void here and could we survive it. After all he would be gone for weeks on end during this time. We have always had a very active sex life since practically day one of meeting. OK, I'm not a slut here we waited a few weeks after our first initial meeting anyway.
After our discussion of how sex would be few and far between we found some simple wonderful, joyful, and blessed alternatives. Trucker got online and ordered me a "friend" of the battery operated variety. Oh how I became very close to my "friend" for that long year. Right about now you're thinking this is way more than I ever wanted to know about her.
When trucker took the local job a few months ago my little "friend" starting collecting dust and quite honestly went unnoticed by myself and trucker. Now my nightstand doesn't have drawers in it and "friend" had been kept underneath on the floor in a basket when his services were not required. "Friend" had been forgotten and not thought of in a long time. That is until...................................
Rug rat 1 and Rug rat 2 were in our bedroom one night watching tv. More than likely some great episode of Sponge Bob Square Pants that they couldn't live without. Trucker and I were in the living room watching the races and were having a good time together. When out of our bedroom Rug rat 2 comes running with "friend" in his hand and thrusts it upon Trucker asking "what is this thing"? OMG I could have died of embarrassment at this time. It was all I could do to keep from jumping and running leaving trucker all alone to face this question. I regained control of myself and looked over at trucker as well and said "well since he asked you and not me, what is that thing"? Without missing a beat trucker looked Rug rat 2 in the face while he managed to keep a straight face and reached out and took "friend" and calmly said "It's a flashlight that Treasia has used from time to time while daddy was on the road, in case the power went out she knew right where it was". Wonderful answer trucker! Now he's gonna ask how you turn it on. But Rug rat 2 accepted this answer and ran back into our bedroom to resume his Sponge Bob cartoon watching and never give it another thought. Trucker and I both however burst out laughing and said how damn lucky we were that Rug rat 2 wasn't more inquisitive about it than that.
"Friend" was packed deeply away that night and hopefully never to be seen or heard from again. At least unless trucker decides he ever has the desire to travel from one end of the US to the other again.
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Now fellow bloggers share your moments in time with me. I have bared my soul to you and hope to hear some wonderful "moments" from you.
Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
There are 5,000 types of snakes on earth and 4,998 live in ARKANSAS .
There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in ARKANSAS plus a
couple no one's seen before.
If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.
Onced and Twiced are words.
It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.
People actually grow and eat okra.
'Fixinto' is one word.
There is no such thing as 'lunch.' There is only dinner and then there is
supper.
Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when
you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar!
Backards and forwards means 'I know everything about you.'
You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is.
You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH them.
You measure distance in minutes.
Sometimes you have to switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day.
'Fix' is a verb. Example: 'I'm fixing to go to the store.'
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable,
grain, plant, insect or animal.
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
unlocked.
You know what a 'DAWG' is.
You carry jumper cables in your car . . . for your OWN car.
There are only four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and ketchup.
The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but
require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.
The first day of deer season is a national holiday.
100 degrees Fahrenheit 'a little warm .'We have four seasons: Almost
Summer , Summer, still Summer and Christmas.
Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-martin' or
off to 'Wally World.'
A cool snap (below 70 degrees) is good pinto-bean weather.
A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola or pop . . . it's a Coke,
regardless of brand or flavor. Example: 'What kinda coke you want?'
We don't need no stinking driver's ed . . . if our mama says we can drive,
we can drive.
Trucker and I spent the day together yesterday once again while he worked. He had deliveries to make up in the northeastern part of Tennessee and the middle part of Mississippi. Our day started early to me at the ungodly hour, around 4:00 a.m. This is when we left the house and headed for a 45 minute drive to the truck. I still find it amazing what lengths I will go to to spend the day with trucker. Needless to say we drove in silence for that 45 minutes as neither mine nor trucker's coffee had kicked in yet.
The drive through Tennessee is beautiful with the route we took. Trucker has to take a lot of two lane roads to get to his destinations really he is avoiding the weight scales, but shush about it. To me those two lanes are much more scenic and fun to drive. We get to see a lot of nature and beautiful country side this way. Deers coming out for fresh food in the early light of dawn. Naturally I had forgotten the camera yet again. I swear I am gonna glue that puppy to my wrist. I did have the cell phone and took some pics with it, but damn they didn't turn out.
Since trucker's Sirius radio is on the fritz again we spent the majority of this time out joy riding working just talking. Sirius is really starting to tick me off about their equipment. They are sending a new radio out for the third time now. At least we aren't having to pay for it, but the pain and suffering of not having it to listen to is very hard. Trucker is I really believe going through withdrawals as he hasn't been able to listen to Nascar Radio in over a week. You know this might explain his sour demeanor with me yesterday.
Like I said the day started really well seeing the countryside and taking it all in. Most mornings I am damn sure not awake at that time of day.
By afternoon,after heading into Mississippi, our talks was turning from fun and lighthearted chat into more of a confessional type therapy session. The fun had went out of it all. Still we continued on with our session. You know how these type of conversations go, one thing leads to another and another and so it goes. However I couldn't stop myself. Why oh why couldn't I have just kept my damn mouth shut? Oh don't think for one minute I wasn't giving thought to all things we were discussing or what I was asking or even talking about, but for the life of me I just couldn't shut the hell up. Before trucker and I ever married we had talked about how we would always be honest and up front with one another. We would hold nothing back, keep nothing to ourselves and talk till blue in the face about anything that might be bothering us. Now I wonder if that was a big screw up. We somehow ended up on the topic of our kids and how we, trucker and I, have different views on many aspects of child raising, discipline and things of this nature. How I feel that teaching children to respect things and people is important and how they don't need things till they learn respect for other people's property and items. Now I'm not saying trucker doesn't teach those things but we have much different views of how to teach this respect. And so the therapy went..............................
Neither of us ever got angry, raised our voices or got upset really about anything we were discussing. In fact we actually had some laughs over some of it and lightened the mood a little for a short period of time anyway. I have said it before and I will say it again "Blending two families is freaking hard" but somehow and some way it's all worth it. Never for one minute think it's easy peasy to do. Or even fun to do sometimes but if you love each other it is worth it. I keep telling myself this on a daily basis.
Now the truth comes out! In the course of said therapy session I made the mistake of asking a question of trucker. Did I expect an honest answer? Not really. However I got one anyway. I asked if he had ever regretted asking me to marry him in the two years we have been married. What the fuck did I ask this question for? Someone please tell me what my idiotic brain was thinking? His answer was honest, to freaking honest. His answer "Yes, for a while I thought you were a real bitch". My chin dropped, I almost cried, I bit my lip and held tight. I responded "Well don't feel like the lone ranger here cause I did to".
So unless you want a really honest answer FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T ASK A REALLY STUPID QUESTION.
Therapy session was closed then and we didn't charge each other a dime.
I knew I would give up my life for you,
